I finally realize that what I had thought were feelings of love were neurotic symptoms of depression — I merely want people to love *me*
If people don’t fall in love with me I feel sad. Even if I really don’t want them.
Today I am sad to not get the attention I’d been getting from someone.
I just have to keep reminding myself, it’s not love, it’s not love, it’s not love, it’s just me responding to a mental illness.
Well, at least that makes me feel better.
And I am sure my husband would prefer that over me going and getting this man. o_0